Thursday, January 21, 2010


Today I just feel like posting bits.
I’ve lost 3 pounds! This isn’t that much for me given that I set a goal of -20 pounds about 15 days ago, but I think once I actually start going to the gym again it will pick up. Also, this means just 17 more pounds till I reach new goal!!! Woot woot!

I’ve kept my resolution not to buy anything (the lack of income helps). My only recent purchase was hair dye, paper clips, and mascara. I used a Wal-Mart gift card I received for Christmas to buy this so I’m going with ‘this doesn’t really count/ it was all useful’. Plus, I view these as job finding expenses. I needed the paper clips for my resumes and you have to look presentable to get a job right??? I’m especially proud that I went in knowing what I wanted, and came out with only what I went in to get.

Because I know you’re dying to know... I’ve dyed my hair medium ash brown. My hair was dyed light ash brown in my pic (yeah, I’m going wild right?).

On the job front I just got a semi-job! Last summer I worked for a local Unitarian Universalist church in my hometown. They were really great people and my job was the summer infant and toddler teacher. Basically, I played with infants and toddlers then cleaned and sanitized every Sunday for a few hours. Last night I received an email from them asking if I would be available to work for them again and provide some other babysitting services. My response…HURRAY!!! The extra cash will definitely help!

I’ve put 58 of my DVDs up for sale and have gotten a few bites!

My sister has been a huge help in the job search. She has helped with my resumes and is generally supportive. She has had a lot of experience with a lot of things (and is generally successful) so I know I can ask her anything and she will have a great answer. If she hasn’t had an experience with it, she at least has an idea of where I can find an answer. I am so grateful for her.

I’ve given my resume to several animal hospitals and a medical clinic, applied to Blockbuster and Books-A-Million, and will give my application and resume to a local daycare tomorrow. I really hope one of these works out.

I’ve also submitted an application to Teach for America. I would have to move and teach in a disadvantaged area, but this is something I think would be fulfilling. It is, however, a two year commitment. Basically, I would be deciding between this and grad school. On the plus side it is an instant salary and I would be doing a good service. Also, getting into a graduate program would mean moving as well. I actually would like to move. My only hesitation on leaving to go far far away is my nephew. I love him so much and I want him to really know me.

I have scheduled my GRE and have given myself a deadline of Monday to ask for teacher recommendations. I am extremely nervous about the recommendations.

I checked out some books from the library today. Among them were Every Dead Thing by John Connolly, Finnegans Wake by James Joyce, Only Revolutions by Mark Danielewski, and The Grail King by Joy Nash. I am really excited about Only Revolutions. I read Danielewski’s novel House of Leaves back in August and absolutely loved it. His books are definitely not for everyone (his works can drive you a bit mad), but they are masterpieces.

All in all, I’ve been doing pretty well since my last post.
Off to study for my GRE!
Love to ALL!

Friday, January 15, 2010

Resolutions Fail


Well, so far I’m failing (maybe I jinxed myself by calling them New Year’s Resolutions). I have yet to get a job. I still don’t know what to do with my life, and we can go on from there. I am actually excelling at finishing all the books I start, but I really really really want to drop There but for the Grace of God by Fred Rosen. His books look so interesting (of course my library doesn't carry most of them) so I thought I would check out the only one my library carried. It is supposed to be about seven survivors of serial killers. However, it really isn’t and I’ll probably expand on that at another time.

Another fail, I bought new books. But does it really count if I didn’t pay for them? I went to the used bookstore with B (it was peer pressure really) and traded some of mine in and got three. I think I did good considering that I could have gotten one more book but instead I opened an account. And I got books I couldn’t get at the library. Also, it doesn’t count if I simply acquire the books. Right? I went through the books B was turning in and found about fifteen I wanted to read. So now I have that stack sitting in my room. Also, my father just gave me another Joseph Campbell book to read. Anyone else feel like there just isn’t enough time to read everything that you want to read?

I think I also failed with how often I am supposed to blog. But for this I have an excuse! Kind of. I was planning on writing on Monday, but I woke up with a no good, horrible, evil migraine. Then, I had to take my best/worst frenemy Imitrex, which left me nauseas and wiped out on Tuesday. Hurray. Fun. Time. On Wednesday I had to pick my father’s stepson up from school and watch him till after nine. I got a lot of reading done, but felt wonky from spending so much time at my father’s house. So, I dove into the wonderful sea of fiction and let its waters cleanse me.

The gym is also a failure. I still haven’t been yet, but tomorrow is the day. I swear!

About applying to graduate school… If I apply to graduate school this go around I need to schedule my GRE and email my Professors for recommendations. This is the part that terrifies me. Not the GRE but asking for Professors recommendations.

Every other resolution is going quite well. So !Hurray! for that.

Well, now I’m tired. So I will finish my fish-shaped bottle of white wine (thanks to my sister) and read until I fall asleep.
Love to ALL!

Thursday, January 7, 2010

One Thing

Today is a day for one thing and one thing only.


Monday, January 4, 2010

Resolutions and Picasso

Last night I was thinking about New Years Resolutions. Mostly I was thinking about how I haven't made one for the last several years. I make resolutions randomly throughout the year, but rarely at New Years. This year my random resolutions have landed on New Years. Since I know your dying to know them here they are:
1. Get a JOB.
2. Get some idea of what I want to do with my life.
3. Apply to Graduate School.
4. Volunteer (after finding a job).
5. Finish all the books I start.
6. Read all the books I own before buying new ones and check library before buying. - Or sell the ones I don’t wish to read.
7. Don’t buy frivolous things. -This should be easy since on the 15th I will have no money and need more by the next 15th.
8. Improve working vocabulary. – Apparently normal people use more than just psych and criminology terms when talking.
9. Write in blog at least weekly. (Hurray!!!)
10. Start writing short stories and poetry again.
11. Lose another 20 pounds.
12. Go to the gym at least twice a week.
13. Walk Ursa whenever weather permits.- Ursa is my amazing 11 year old (her 11th birthday was New Years Day!) Miniature Schnauzer.
14. Make friends that live in the same general area. (Most of my friends live out of town….. I have no social life now)
15. Stay on top of cleaning.
16. Get rid of junk. -I like to be surrounded by stuff. It doesn’t have to be nice stuff, just stuff. That needs to stop.
17. Try not to let family hurt my feelings. –Trust me, easier said than done.
18. Try not to fight with family. -Trying is the best I can offer.
19. Limit TV time.
20. Go to bed at a reasonable hour. – The job should help with this.

Now on to that lovely Picasso Award from the amazing Courtney . Hmmmm 7 facts about myself...
1. Like Courtney, I love horrible horrible horror/sci-fi movies. I can watch them for hours and hours. I also love good horror/sci-fi movies. But, more often than not, I find myself gravitating to B C D list movies. The best part about these movies, you can laugh your arse off and still get scared. When a horror movie filled with A list actors and a big budget fails, it just sucks. But when a low or kind of low budget movie with not so big actors fails, it is almost always hilarious. Stilted dialog , plot holes (sigh) a good night.
2. Another vice of mine is Romance Novels. I read my first Romance Novel while spending the night at B's house in high school. She always reads to go to sleep so she handed me one of her books. It was Brenda Joyce's The Prize. I began reading, skeptical. Around 5 a.m. B rolled over pulled her eye mask off and croaked (in the way only someone disturbed from their sleep can croak) "why the hell are you still up? Go. To. Sleep." I obeyed reluctantly, woke up an hour later and finished the book. This is a nasty habit I have. I start a book and several hours later I have neglected everything I was supposed to be doing. I often tell myself "Just one more chapter and I'll go to sleep." I'm such a liar. Anyway, that night started my love affair with romance novels. At first I was obsessed with Pirate themed historical novels. They often involve a kidnapping and while my mind is screaming "Stockholm Syndrome!" I'm still loving it. Pirate historical led to historical and if memory serves me correctly Courtney led me to paranormal good paranormal romances (I'd tried a few bad ones first) and mystery/crime romances. Now I read a mixture of the genres, and love them all!
3. I am an Aquatarian. This is like a vegetarian only I also eat water dwellers. Some refer to this as a pescetarian. *I originally had a lot more written after that but I have decided to save that for another day. Right now, as part of me is saying "Save this for later. It can wait! Don't make this too long!" another part of me is saying "Write! Write! You must explain yourself!" But I'm going to revisit this another time. It could easily be its' own post... or 3. (don't worry it won't be 3)
4. I suffer from an undifferentiated connective tissue disease (or a Mixed Connective Tissue Disease MCTD). Basically I have had really bad joint and muscle pains since I was in high school. My freshman year in college I started getting hives associated with it and in my sophomore year I developed a sensitivity to sunlight and must always wear sunscreen. Lately I've been feeling a lot better. I had to recently have my knee injected but other than that I've been comparatively pain free. (Hurray) I'll probably post about this at another time as well.
5. I have the most amazing dog in the world. Her name is Ursa Noir. She was born January 1st, 1999. My family got her in February of that year. I am extremely close to her. When I was very depressed she was always there for me. She always lets me know I'm loved.
6. I am terrified of daddy long legs and mosquito hawks. I don't know when it started, but for as long as I can remember they have terrified me.
7. I get really attached to Jewelry. I have worn the same necklace (actually I've gone through 4 chains, but kept the same pendant) for over a year now. As well as the same ring. I only take them off for medical reasons (like getting an X ray) or when I do take them off I keep them with me in my purse or somewhere on my person. I've done this with various pieces of jewelry since I was in Middle school. Generally the only reason I stopped wearing the item was because it broke or fell off and was lost. I think the habit of wearing the jewelry comforts me.
Well there is that part of my fulfillment. I will send this out when/if I get more Bloggie friends!
Love to ALL!

Sunday, January 3, 2010

Great Start! Right?

I feel like a very, very, bad blogger. I start a blog and then just ignore it for days. Bad, Bad Blogger (shaking pointed finger at myself). I've been distracted, what with being out of school and unemployed. Also, I was in a funk for a few days.

So here is an update.

Christmas Eve was interesting. My father's power was out so the scheduled movie at his house was canceled. This somehow led to us meeting him and his step-son at a Waffle House and having dinner there for Christmas Eve. That's a new one for my family. I personally preferred it over going to his house. A house that objectively I would love, but instead it just makes me uncomfortable. I bet your wondering where my father's wife was. Well, she was taking her youngest back to his father (She doesn't have custody). There is a path I could go down now, but I'm not going to (working on this whole personal growth thing).

On to Christmas. It was rather uneventful. I felt the wicked pangs of depression. All the bad thoughts came rushing at me, threatening to bury me under their weight. However, I managed to shield myself and move on. All holidays, birthdays, etc. seem to bring them on, but they were not as bad as they used to be. All was fine.
We exchanged presents. Nothing big. I received a beautiful ring from my Granny. It was given to her by my parents when she retired and now she's passing it to me. The best part of Christmas was dinner time. My Sister and Brother decided to throw a Scandinavian Christmas dinner (no we don't have any Scandinavian ancestry). It was great. Also, while reading other blogs we came across a great Buttered Rum recipe thanks to Jenny Mac. Warning: It makes a lot.

The next days were mostly uneventful. I spent New Years with my mother and sister (both of which fell asleep before midnight). I, of course, stayed up. Reading. Till 6 am.
I know, I know, I'm wild.
I swear.

I did get to spend some time with my friend B. She's been in town for Winter Break so we've been hanging out. We've known each other since 4th grade and have been friends since middle and high school. At times we were off and on(mostly due to drama caused by mutual "friends"). But luckily all that died down back in high school and I have a friend for life. One of the reasons we get along so well is that we can not talk for months and then pick up right where we left off. I always know that if I call she'll be there for me, but I don't have to call. Our mutual love of romance and crime novels, paranormal anything, crime anything, and horror movies helps.

Now, I've been given an Award by the wonderful Courtney at Work in Progress ! As new to the Blog scene as I am, I don't know seven people to pass this on to. And I'm not exactly sure what to do with it. So.... I'm waiting to post on it till tomorrow. But then I Promise I will.

Have A wonderful Day!